This post sucks....

This post is going to be the hardest post that I have posted, maybe ever.  As I have shared over the years, very clearly, I needed help to lose weight.  I needed to have weight loss surgery to take control of my life back and get myself to a healthy weight.

Fast forward 2 years, to the fall of 2015.  I had been sitting at between 175 & 179 since July 2014 and had gone into to "coast" mode.  In September 2015, I injured my knee and was no longer able to run, squat, or do much of anything I had grown accustomed to doing as I was losing weight.  I was in the process of getting to the bottom of this issue and speaking to the doctor about the options to correct the pain in my knee, when both sides of my family ran into health crises.  

My father-in-law ended up with a pacemaker, and my Nana passed away, and in between the two, my dad was in the hospital as well.  Trips and stays in the hospital aren't good for anyone's stress level or diet, and I started to allow myself to fall back into old habits.  

I have now had 3 Synvisc injections in my knee and am still in pain, all day, every day.  I have no cartilage in my left knee at all, so the hope was that these injections would do the job that the cartilage should be doing, but it appears not to be the case for me.  I wake up in pain every day, it hurts for me to sit for too long, or to stand/walk for too long.  

The point of all this rambling, for lack of a better word, is to explain that life has gotten in the way.  I said when I chose to have weight loss surgery that it was nothing more than a tool, and one that I had to use or it wouldn't work.  I haven't been using my tool.  I've been in cruise control, heading down the highway to my old self and bad habits.  

I got on the scale yesterday morning, and to my horror, 202.00 was staring back at me.  I swore I'd never breech the 200 mark again, but alas, I have.  It's time for me to get my act back in gear.  We are finishing up the school year and preparing for our family vacation to Disney.  I was super excited and bought some new clothes for the trip, only to find that the size I've been wearing for over a year and a half is too small.  My size 14's aren't fitting me anymore.  Well, I'm not OK with that, and I'm not going to just accept it.  

So I'm going to be spending my summer getting back to the things that I know how to do to get my weight back under control.  I'm going to be drinking protein shakes, getting in my protein from meet, eating more vegetables and fruit, no sweet tea.  I've got to re-gain control of my eating and my lifestyle, before I end up back at the 270 pounds I weighed when I started this journey.  

I'm only going to weigh myself once/week (On Sunday mornings) to avoid my scale obsession and frustration.  I hope you'll encourage and support me as I continue to share this journey with you all.  

Krista