So, the elephant in the room when someone talks about weightloss is always 1 of 2 things, "How did you let yourself get so big to begin with" or "I can't believe that you ate that" etc. I am going to step outside of my normal comfort zone and rather than type about my weight-loss journey, I am typing this to the friends, family members and aquaintances of anyone who has ever had to undertake such a massive, life-changing experience. You see, if you have never had to do something like this for yourself, it may seem difficult to understand, and I want for everyone to know what we, the overweight trying to change it, need from our friends and loved ones.
1--It is not easy for us to exist every day in a skinny/healthy world in our current state. The mere thought of going into a gym, or discussing our current health situation can and often does induce panic and anxiety that we are going to be judged which is one reason why so many of us have stayed this way for so long. We know and understand exactly what we are, and what we must look like to people who have never had a weight problem, but the last thing we need or want is judgement.
2--This is a life-altering experience, one that is very difficult. This is something that is going to have its ups and downs, just like anyone who is changing anything major in their life would attest to. My particular situation is one that includes 36 years of horrible eating and exercise habits. 36 years of bad habits are NOT easy to overcome. There will be times that we make bad decisions. We will make bad decisions about our eating and exercise routines. We will hit plateus, both physically and mentally. You cannot possibly be any more let down or frustrated by these things than we are, so please don't judge or belittle us for them, please continue to show your support.
3--If you don't know what to say, or even for a split second question the appropriateness of a comment you are about to make, don't make it. It is hard enough to undertake this journey, small sarcasting and well-intended comments can easily send us into a tailspin of epic proportion.
4 and final--this is not easy! If it was, there would be no audience interest in shows like "The Biggst Loser", "I Used to be Fat", "Heavy", etc. This is an epidemic, and if it was easy to overcome, there wouldn't be enough overweight people in the world for these shows to be successful....just a though.
Thanks for reading....feel free to share with your friends and loved ones.
Krista
Krista - this is so true! Thank you for breaking down your walls to let this out. I will share this in my blog if you don't mind?
ReplyDeleteErin--Please do!
ReplyDeleteKrista, I have been in this place and it isn't fun by any means. Just know that as you are working toward your new healthy life, that it is a journey like no other. The mixed feelings all are a part of it and you might not ever forget them but you will overcome them. Thanks for sharing these words of how you are feeling.. Let it be known that not everyone looks at heavier people in this manner some of us have been there and want to encourage you during your journey..
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